
An Ultimate Chaos Interview 

Victim's Handle: J.S.Bach 
UC Rep's Handle: Rhape79 
Date:3-30-99 

Before we begin is there anything you would like to confess? 

Just to humbly express my thanx to Rhapexx for asking me to do this interview. 
I don't really consider myself worthy enough or important to be interviewed, 
but in any case, here goes... 

01. Who are you, what do you do, what kind of music do you like etc.. and how 
did you get your nick? 

I am currently doing research at a major U, in the area of applied/theoretical 
mathematics and am trying to finish a PhD. The nick J.S.Bach has been gotten 
from my favourite composer. As music is a mind virus (a "meme") that is hosted 
by the brain, thus I have devoted my nick to the greatest virus writer of all 
times: Johann Sebastian Bach. 
There are "programmers" and there are programmers out there. Bach has been one 
of the greatest mind programmers of all times. 

02. Where are you from? 

I am from Europe. From a very "old" part of Europe. At least 2,000 years old. 
:*) 

03. How would you describe yourself (eg. mad, antisocial, above average 
intelligence etc..)? 

I am a typical nerdy, antisocial, manic-depressive, who is very prone to 
falling into bouts of self-doubt, and paranoia. My intelligence is average. 
Yet, I really adore all aspects of life, negative and positive and am not 
critical of anything. You want to be my friend? Just be polite and friendly. 
That's all. I don't care what your background is, where you come from, or how 
smart you are. If you approach me with an honest and friendly attitude, I will 
be one of your best friends. If you approach me with the "know-it-all" 
attitude, you may suddently discover that my IQ can be variable and can jump 
up to 200 to initimidate you. 

04. How did you get involved in the VX scene? 

I was asked by Spooky one-two years ago to work for the CodeBreakers, as they 
did not have anybody working on Macs. So I gladly oblidged. But even before I 
joined the CBs, I was the author of one of the first 16-18 viruses on the Mac in 
1991. The T4. The description for the original T4 virus, is still inside the 
Disinfectant's manual, the best freeware virus scanner by John Norstad, 
discontinued since then. 

05. Are you part of any VX team, if so which one(s) and fer how long? 

I am still with the Codebreakers, as these guys have tight schedules and they 
produce. Heck, they even force me to produce new stuff as well. I like that. 

06. How many viruses have you written to date, and which do you feel was the 
'best' one? 

Todate, I have written 5 major families for the Mac (T4, CODE 32767, MDEF E/F, 
flag, SevenDust/666), but some of them have many substrains. The 666/SevenDust 
family for example has over 14 substrains, and more are coming out as we speak. 
The 666 broke many international records, (first 
encrypting/symbiotic/polymorphic mac virus) but you understand this is not 
really bragging, since i cannot get the credit :*) 

07. What do you see as the future fer yourself (and your team(s))? 

The future of Codebreakers is bright. The task they have assumed, teaching the 
newbies, is quite difficult, and as such, I have to really commend them for 
the job. I have often been asked to drop my code down a bit to match their 
newbie criteria, but you see, the Mac has been lagging behind for many years, 
and i must retain a certain momentum to catch up with the PC guys. 

08. What languages do you know? 

Pascal, C, Ratfor, Fortran and 6800x0 asm 

09. Are there any viruses in particular which you think were good (eg. great 
survival, stealth, encryption etc..)? 

I can only comment on the area of the Macs, but I will humbly try to address 
the PC area as well. On the Mac side, the most successful virus was the 
AutoStart worm, which you all may know, which used the Quicktime Autoplay 
feature to activate as soon as the user inserted external media. On the PC 
side, I had the greatest laughs of my life with Vic's Class Macro which 
displayed the message "You are a big stupid jerk" on the user's screen. THAT, 
is what i consider funny :*) 

10. What do you think of viral payloads - and more specifically destructive 
payloads? 

The issue of destructive payloads is a complicated one. It can be viewed from 
an individual standpoint (as a human sympathizer) and from a global 
statistical standpoint. Some arguments for such payloads are addressed on one 
of the links of my webpage at <http://rivendell.fortunecity.com/sword/929/>. 
Therein, I am trying to present an alternate view of WHY such payloads are 
necessary, because they naturally put a bound to the information flow that has 
swept all of us. This question cannot really be analyzed in one paragraph. 

11. Unique question here - Can you describe the perfect virus? 

With my limited knowledge, i'd have to say religion is the 'perfect' virus. 
It is a mind virus, but you did not ask about computer viruses only :*) 

Next, on my list of 'perfect' viruses comes music. In particular, I am 
constantly 'infected' by the music of Johann Sebastian Bach. 

On the less technical side, such a virus would need to be first addressed 
theoretically, as to whether it exists or not. I think it does. But there is a 
huge distance between proving its existence and implementing it. I think the 
perfect computer virus would be a really simple virus that would be absolutely 
necessary for the OS to carry it with it at all times in order for the OS to 
be functional. In other words, in my opinion, symbiotism plays a crucial role. 
In other words, the virus will have to do something terribly useful as well, 
so that the OS would constantly need it. I think this would be its first major 
evolutionary step towards system acceptance. On the other hand, proving the 
existence of a polymorphic self replicating pattern, should not be impossible 
either. No wonder I am investigating this as my PhD thesis. 

12. What is your opinion of pro-virus members/groups, and why? 

I like balance of power. Teaching newbies the art of virus writing, gives them 
the "tools" to fight back, if they want to. It is up to them what they do with 
this knowledge. I think we have been overflowed by the software companies and we 
depend too much on the regular flow of information in our lives. Having the 
tool to "slash" this info away from a lamer who thinks he is God because he managed 
to get in a high position and treats everybody like crap, is the way to go. On 
the other hand, one may simply consider the natural bounds that should occur 
when this information gets out of hand. And when information gets out of hand, 
that's where viruses come to the rescue. It is the exact same analogue with 
life's biological viruses strengthening existing life forms (by forcing 
genotype mutations), or taking out weaker ones that have no chance to continue. I think 
anybody intelligent can see the similarity. 

13. What is your opinion of anti-virus members/companies, and why? 

Ah, I hold no hard feelings for them. They are just doing their job. Poorly 
most of the time, but you can't blame them really. The virus makes are the 
controllers of the game. The AV guys are simply "dragged" into the game 
because of financial/employment reasons. And everybody knows that wins he, who 
does what he does because he likes it. Not because he has to meet some project 
quota. Eventually, the wealth of viruses will force them to collapse like a 
domino. Look at the sizes of the AV programs today, and you will see what 
I mean. :*) 

14. If Microsoft offered you a job to work on MSAV - Would you take it? 

No. I don't like 9-5 jobs, and I certainly don't like for my work to be 
copyrighted by somebody else. Not to mention that if I had to figer out what 
1000 different viruses were doing, I'd go nuts. 

15. Are there any pro-virus members/groups you'd like to greet? 

As always, cheers to all the VX groups out there, and special greets to some 
of the real geniouses like Spooky, Vic, Anaktas, Rhape, Natas, Opic, Camel, 
Serial. All the rest not mentioned by name, keep up the good work. 

16. Are there any anti-virus members/companies you'd like to greet? 

Ho, ho, for the Mac there are only two worthwhile: Symantec and NAI. These 
guys have been running like mules trying to disinfect against my latest 
viruses, but I think they are actually enjoying it. More to come guys :*) 

17. This is your bit to say what ever you like (announce your next virus, tell 
us about your team, whatever...) 

I would just like to offer a big thanx to the Universe, for keeping me alive 
still. Maybe it sees some sort of purpose, afterall. 

I love you guys. Keep up the good job, and remember: Balance of power 

Too much order is equivallent to too much chaos. 

Thank you fer taking the time to do this interview. 
